A friend of mine, Kareen, introduced me to poets particulary the spoken word poets. She did it in a fun way through Facebook. It wasn't that far ago but since then I have developed a love for spoken poets. I love the passion when they speak and how their words captivate me. I even try not to blink! LOL
In one of my YouTube clicks, I came across this amazing poet, Sarah Kay. She touches controversial topics such as "If I should have a daughter". This one, "The Type", I liked more because it talked about a woman and what defines her. I like it because she has great creative way of getting her point through. It's not too straight foward and it gives me moment to think. Here's a Rappler article about it too.
It's true. Even in our society where we claim to have equal rights of men and women, there are still certain biases against women. In my opinion, it is even more evident in a Filipino community. I set myself as an example. I've been brought up in a conservative Filipino family where as a woman, you have to be submissive, serving, and pleasing to your husband at all cost. It's how a woman and a wife has to be. This line here hits a significant point when she said,
If you grow up the type of woman men want to touch,you can let them touch you.Sometimes it is not you they are reaching for.Sometimes it is a bottle. A door. A sandwich. A Pulitzer. Another woman.But their hands found you first. Do not mistake yourself for a guardian.Or a muse. Or a promise. Or a victim. Or a snack.
Women are often tagged with the relationships and the service that she does to society. She is a mother, a mistress, a wife, the other woman. No matter what she does differently, she's tagged with that. When a man does the same, he remains a man. We can't blame everything to society either because even we, as women, conform either consciously or subconsciously to that. So undoubtedly, we want to be tagged with the best title. By doing so, we sometimes forget who we really are and what we really want. That's because in our society, a woman who smells, smells the worst (while a man-whore remains a man). A married woman is nothing without children, so as society dictates. Or at least, that's what I thought and believe. This is probably the reason I'm depressing once in awhile. I'm not even sure if I want to or drawn to want it because I wanted people to stop asking when's the next child to be. The poem is a reminder that as women, let's consciously be mindful of who we really are. We are not decorations, not a maid, not a trophy, or men can snack. It's okay if you want it to be but never be pushed into someone you think society needs you to be.
A woman is a builder. She has her own dreams and ambitions. She is not a work horse or a baby factory. She can be if she wants to but that is not who defines her. I am yet to hear a beauty pageant contestant to answer rightfully the question, "What is the essence of a woman?" For me, it's the unique individual who she really is.